Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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