Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
