Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
