The brown eye won't let me do that either.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
