i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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