did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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