And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i just wanna soil my oats bro
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
