i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
