My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
