So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
