She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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