Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
