Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
