worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
