it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize