I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
