I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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