It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize
