i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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