I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
