4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
