ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
