Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
