I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
