I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
