I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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