guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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