So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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