She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
