Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
