I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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