At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
