yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
