Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
