yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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