I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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