So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
