Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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