Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
