i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
