Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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