So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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