two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I need to calm my uterus...
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize