No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize
