maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
