They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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