Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
