Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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