jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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