Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
